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The first rule of the sale: people do not like to be sold

The first and most fundamental selling rule is that people don’t like being sold. It’s a paradox: people buy things all the time. Trillions of dollars’ worth of products and services are bought and sold, in stores, by mail, on the Internet. So how come people don’t like being sold when obviously so much happens?

The answer is that they are being sold without realizing it. People like to buy things, because buying makes them feel like they are in control. Being sold, on the contrary, it implies being controlled.

Let’s take the familiar stereotype of the used car salesman. Customer n. # 1 goes to the dealership, and before he has a chance to express what he is looking for, the overbearing, talkative salesperson tries to impose a heavy, expensive luxury car on him. What the salesperson would have discovered, if he had bothered to find out, is that this customer has a limited budget; you want a reliable, fuel-efficient car.

Customer n. 2 is a young mother. She receives the same treatment, but what she really wants is a car that is safe to take her children. Customer n. 3 squeezes into the luxury car too, but he’s a wealthy single man who wants to impress single women – he wants a bright red sports car.

All three customers want and need a car, but they don’t trust the seller, because he obviously doesn’t care about their wishes. What if the other car dealer, in the future, really “got it” about helping these customers find what they really want? They would take the whole business, right?

A good salesperson, of cars or whatever, makes his potential customer feel good about buying the product or service, not forced, coerced or deceived. They want the seller to understand their wants and needs and satisfy them.

As salespeople, we create in our prospects the desire to buy by appealing to their emotions. An effective used car salesman would appeal to Customer 1’s desire for economy, Customer 2’s desire for safety, and Customer 3’s desire to attract the attention of the opposite sex.

If you do this successfully, your client will not feel sold because you have provided the solution to your problem. Understand your customer’s motives for buying, and you can create sales messages that speak to their wants and needs, their wants and dreams, and they will make their way to your door, eager to buy from you.

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