It is said that listening is the most difficult skill to teach. That can have a lot to do with both the speaker and the listener. The speaker may not be talking about a topic that interests you, or the listener may be tired and therefore out of focus.
There are a number of reasons why listening and getting people to listen to you is hard work. But there are ways to help your child listen to you and make them better able to communicate with each other.
Make sure when you are listening to your child that you are looking at him. How many times a day do you have to say “Look at me so I know you’re listening”? Well, they learn what you teach them. Therefore, always give your children your full attention (when possible) when they try to talk to you. In return, they will also look at you when you are talking.
If you want to talk to your child, make sure you are at eye level. Seventy percent of all communication is verbal and by doing this you are reinforcing to your child that they are important and also that what you are saying is important to them.
When you listen to your child, let him finish what he is saying. It is very easy to get involved because he knows what he wants to say, but this is demanding on the child and makes him feel like he is not a good communicator. However, this does not mean that you should sit there in silence.
If when talking to your friend they stop giving you feedback, for example “Umm?” and sincerely?” then we instantly think they are not listening to what you have to say, try it if you don’t believe me. So when you’re listening to your child, make sure you’re giving him positive feedback, too. This will encourage the child to open up more and feel comfortable speaking.
Listening and communication are only verbal. Your child’s body language posture and tone of voice may be the biggest indication of how he feels, and the reverse is true.
It’s so easy to be sending out vibes that scream “leave me alone!” and your child will pick up on this, making it difficult for you to start a conversation.
It’s hard to mask your body language, especially after a hard day, but always try to make sure you have open body language that always allows communication to flow freely.
