It has become painfully obvious to me that we have become a nation of zombies. The amount of time we spend on our computers and checking our phones has left us dumbstruck. I am also guilty of this. What I have found most interesting is in my counseling practice. Discord and conflict in relationships increased nearly 1,000 percent. How can this be? Easy. We are too busy writing and we don’t talk anymore.
Have you noticed when you walk into a coffee shop that at least half of the people are on their phones or tablets? Not that there’s anything wrong with that, but a decade ago, that same coffee shop hosted just about every person-to-person conversation. Surely there would be someone there reading a book. But, for the most part, going for coffee was a social engagement. A time to connect with friends and family. We even see it in restaurants. People sitting alone checking their social networks. Doesn’t sound too social to me.
What about getting that phone call you didn’t expect? Is your first thought: “You can’t just text me like a normal person”? When did human interaction become problematic for so many of us? We get our food delivered to our doors, conversations happen via text, and we find a date with a swipe right or left. It is lost on many of us in today’s fast moving society. And there is cost.
While studies show that most people report having 3-5 close friends, the question is, how do we interact with them? At 52 years old, the way I interact with my friends has changed with this zombie nation. I can remember just 15 years ago when having an hour-long phone conversation was special. Now, it’s frustrating. So, since I’ve noticed these issues with my clients, I decided to make some personal changes.
While I enjoy the convenience of social media, I again appreciate talking on the phone. When I’m with my wife on a date, we have real conversations that are meaningful. Not every second is posted on Facebook. And speaking of Facebook, all the many friends I have that I’ve never met, actually talked to a few, on the phone to solidify the connection. I thought it was important to do this. Why? For many reasons.
Just the other day I was reading about longevity. Where before the top of the list were things like quitting smoking, weight, exercise and stress. And believe it or not, that is no longer the case. Yes, quitting was in the top three, but the top two were related to personal connection and human involvement. In other words, the people who marked the century had a deep and strong family. friendships and community ties. It seems that we are much deeper than our weight, diet, and sleep patterns.
Yes, I think we are a zombie nation. However, the good news is that there is an antidote. Keep your phone. Get off social media. Go have a meaningful conversation… with a zombie.
